Heartless At Best
by BonesBird
Summary: During the last case he found the unsub, but he was too late to save the little girl the team had been searching for. Can she help him through the pain?


**Title: Heartless At Best  
Author: BonesBird  
Summary: During the last case he found the unsub, but he was too late to save the little girl the team had been searching for. Can she help him through the pain?  
Lyrics: New Found Glory - Heartless At Best  
It starts a bit angsty. It does, and I'm sorry, but there will be fluff. I promise. It is also set a couple of years ahead, like… 3 years or something… from my other fics.**

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_And the crowd  
Silent as a whisper  
Listen as she recites her sins  
And one-by-one  
With different agendas  
They pull out their sympathy  
And you're still my living proof_

He called for backup after the shooting. As the cops ran in to arrest the unsub, he ran over to the body laid on the ground. She looked 5 years old. He knew she was 7. Her name was Amanda Cuthbert, and she had been alive ten minutes ago. When the team had heard her scream. He had hoped he'd gotten in early enough. But even as he started compressions and tried to get the little girl breathing. He knew it was too late. He wished the team had found them 15 minutes earlier. So he didn't have to watch the little girl die in his arms.

Through giving his statement, getting his things together, getting on the jet and sitting in his usual seat he felt numb. He tried to listen to music, he tried to sleep, he tried to read. Regardless of what he did, or what anyone said to him, didn't stop him thinking that he had failed. That he was a failure.

Hotch had told him not to drive. Had even offered to give him a lift home. He had turned Hotch down. He knew the one person he needed to see. He needed to see _her_. He needed to see her to prove that all was right in his life. He text her and his first thought on her response was to smile. He couldn't bring himself to smile. As the jet landed his team-mates, his _friends_ all told him that losing Amanda was not his fault. That he had done everything that he possibly could. Every word made him feel worse.

She was standing by the car as he walked down the steps. She ran up to him, he pulled her into his arms and wrapped her up. He didn't feel better, but he felt more comfortable knowing that she was by his side. She wrapped her arm around his waist and walked him to the car, she drove to her place, her place always made him feel better. He sat down while she ordered a pizza. Then wrapped his arms round her as soon as she sat next to him again. Normally they'd put on a movie and talk about the case, but this time he didn't want to and she didn't press. They sat in a comfortable silence. After they ate she pulled him to bed. They curled up together and he started to drift off. She shifted in his arms and his heart skipped a beat. Holding her was the only time he felt real.

In the middle of the night he woke up in a cold sweat. He was clammy, he saw she had rolled to the other side of the bed. He felt her move, and she rolled over and looked at him

"What's the matter babe" Were the words that she said.

Those were the words that tipped him over the edge, he broke down. His tears started falling thick and fast onto her comforter. She sat next to him and ran her hand over his back, trying to soothe him as he let all the fear and self-doubt that the last 24 hours had brought to him. He was glad she was here to ground him and hold him through the night. Once he had unloaded, and told her all about the feelings welling up inside him. She was supportive, telling him, _convincing_ him that this wasn't his fault. Amanda's death was not his fault. He told her that every case reminded him of the baby they lost before it was even born. They had never even told the team.

She agreed maybe now they could try again. Because the one thing they knew, was that they loved each other, and that their bond was stronger than anything that could come between them.

Derek Morgan loved Penelope Garcia.

That was how it would always stay.

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**I'm writing this for my fellow Morcia shippers, Nyre and Paigeypoo. MORCIA BABY!!!  
I know its angsty. I'd never written an angst fic before, but this just felt perfect once I'd written it. I hope nothing gave it away until the end.**


End file.
